This week I had a conflict with my youngest son, he is 19.
He still lives at home, dropped out of college and quit his job. We are
constantly arguing about his education and employment. He gets very defensive
when I mention him going back to college or getting a job.
I have learned this week to incorporate cooperative
strategies by striving to produce a solution that will benefit the both of us
(O’Hare & Wiemann, 2013). We sat down and came up with a compromise that
seems to benefit the both of us. He decided not to go to college right now but
will keep an open mind about it. He also agreed to get a part-time job and I
will continue to help him with the insurance on his car, as long as he is
working.
The three R’s (respectful, reciprocal and responsive) may
positively impact communication by using them as a guide to communicating. The
three R’s were very beneficial in our conflict resolution. We have learned to
respect each other’s opinion. I had to learn to respect him not going to school
and he had to respect my needing him to pay some of his bills. We were both very
responsive to our agreement.
Reference
O’Hair, D. & Wiemann, M. (2012). Real
communication: An introduction. Boston, MA:
Bedford’s/St. Matin’s.
Bedford’s/St. Matin’s.
I must commend you for immediately implementing such a strategy in your home. The three R's produced great resolve and peace in your household I am sure.
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